To Heaven by Water by Justin Cartwright

Author:Justin Cartwright [Cartwright, Justin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction, Family Saga, Death, Humour, Friendship, Forgiveness
ISBN: 1408801035
Google: 69zF1e4_sVQC
Amazon: B002RZZIXA
Publisher: A&C Black
Published: 2009-07-19T23:00:00+00:00

11

Rosalie has adopted a resigned look. Her face, her dancer’s face, the features slightly taut from excessive exercise, is now composed. Her hair is severely pulled back, which contributes to the tautness of her features. Ed thinks of those widows he once saw in an Andalusian cemetery, placing small bunches of flowers in a wall of tombs. The look says, I have been foolish and naive and now I must accept what God has dealt me. There is a logical problem, of course: IVF can bring about the miracle of birth but so far there is no cure for death. He finds Rosalie reordering her clothes closet, as if she has to decide what clothes are appropriate for her reduced rank as a childless person. Her philosophic demeanour is more painful to him than any row they have ever had. He feels deeply sorry for her; he knows that his compassion is suffused with guilt, because he has been banging Alice. Only twice, of course. At the same time he feels a little anger: Rosalie is far too ready to strike a pose. He’s sure they will have a baby by one means or another, but already she has gone into tragic mode. He wonders if the ballet isn’t in some way to blame: it’s all so damn melodramatic. He’s late for work because he wanted Rosalie to reassure him that he could go, but her permission – ‘Yes, yes, you go. I’ll be fine, I’m sure’ – was spoken with such dismal stoicism that he felt he had to make her some tea; fresh mint is her favourite, very refreshing in Morocco, but slightly nauseating on an autumn morning in England, and then he suggested that they make an IVF appointment with Mr Smythson and get on with it and she looked at him with pity.

‘Look, Rosie, we can either roll over and accept this, or we can do what thousands of people do, and go for IVF.’

‘It’s funny, isn’t it, that just a few days ago you were saying don’t worry, I just know we are going to have a baby, and I believed you. Now it’s apparently time to face facts.’

‘That’s so fucking unfair. You are miserable and I just don’t want you to suffer. Everybody has to face facts some time; unfortunately that’s not your strong point.’

‘Don’t worry about me. You know, Ed, more and more you become aggressive when you can’t handle something. I suggest you just toddle off to your little firm, and I’ll stay here tidying the house. That’s all I’m good for, apparently.’

‘You were teaching Congolese Pygmies en pointe and pirouette on Tuesday, while I hung about waiting to pick you up.’

‘With your sister. Eating curry.’

‘Oh, so that’s a crime now? Eating curry with your sister is a crime. I didn’t know.’

‘I was only teaching these refugees, who are not Pygmies, by the way, but AIDS orphans, because I am so lonely.’

‘Rosie, darling, can we talk tonight?’

‘In other words, can I go now and get away from this whining bore? Yes, you may.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.